My funny girl

Bethany has developed a love of "word play" that I have, so we enjoy exchanging puns and silly word play. Today I used the word louse again. She asked what a louse was. I told her that it was the singular of lice, many are lice, a louse is just one, single. She quipped, "You mean it's not married?" with a smirk on her face! Silly girl!

I've seen no signs of the little buggies last night or tonight. I'm greasing down their hair with glosser still, and will do mine. It's messy but if it keeps the lice away, that's great!

We are itching to get out of the house (pun intended), but glad today wasn't the day. We've had a last bit of Old Man Winter here today. After 92 last week, it's been in the 40's all day and we had a fire in our fireplace! Crazy weather.

Update on Mom

When I talked to Mom yesterday, she told me she had slipped in the bathroom, but thankfully had not fallen all the way down. She did bruise her elbow pretty badly and cut it, but was able to get the bleeding stopped (she is on blood thinners right now). Today the Physical Therapist came. Mom said she is sore, but sounded better tonight.

On Friday Ruth (Phils mom---sorry, my keyboard is not letting me put in apostrophes) is going to Mom & Dads house. She will stay until Sat. afternoon. We will go over for lunch Sat. to celebrate our birthdays early (Phil & I both have March birthdays, just 4 days apart, plus 8 years!). Next week, Lord willing, and louse gone, the girls & I will go over Tuesday night & stay til Thursday afternoon.

We are still working on delousing. Some of my friends have shared some hilarious puns about this. One thanked me for the "heads up" warning I sent. Another told me this was really "lousy." Then one had a whole paragraph full of "nit picking" and "itching to get rid of this." I have to laugh to keep from crying. Phil has an itchy head, but I cannot see any signs of lice on his head. I am not sure if they have come off when he combed his hair (he keeps it really short), or if it is psychosomatic, you know, all in his HEAD! hee-hee! Had to explain that word, since it was a real HEAD SCRATCHER. Okay, I will stop. Just do not get me started on chickens and eggs. My friend Stephanie will have to be here for that.

Have a great day.

This wasn't in the job description!

I read the books. You know, those of you who've had a baby, the books that you read when you find out you have a new life inside of you. One that doesn't REALLY come with instructions, but someone is getting rich pretending to have the instructions. I can tell you that nowhere did I see a book titled What to Expect When You Have an Autistic Child or What to Expect When Your 9 Year Old who is Stubborn as a Mule Doesn't get to go to the Zoo with her friends. Nope, didn't find those. I read the books about Strong Willed Kids. I learned, well, that my kids were, indeed, strong-willed. But the instructions that would actually work weren't there. I assumed that the books I DID read were my job description. Starting with pregnancy and on through stories of Homeschoolers who have gone before me in this journey, I've tried to find what it is I'm to do with these kids. I can GUARANTEE that NO JOB DESCRIPTION said, "You will have a lousy immune system, that, once compromised, will keep you sick for a few months before you feel well again. You will have multiple bouts of sinus infections. You will not get sick leave when you have these days. Your children will be crankier than usual when you are sick. You will find lice on their heads, and while the doctor says you should be resting, you will be combing Nit Removal Gel through your child's hair. Your elder child will have your genetic make-up in the hair department. Her thick hair will be the envy of many, until she gets lice, while you are sick. " But, that should have been there. It is totally unfair to hand a new mom a baby and give her these instructions, "No heavy lifting for 3 weeks. Rest when your baby rests. Don't have caffeine if you are breast-feeding your child." First, who is going to do the laundry and pour your glass of milk when the grandmothers have gone home? Second, babies rest? See, they must have confused the little bundles they gave me with some other life form, because my babies didn't do what I expected, especially in the resting department. No caffeine, no spicy food, no ANYTHING with much taste for 3 weeks and guess what? The baby who doesn't sleep cries anyway & has tummy problems! Those first few weeks should have been a clue that the books were wrong.

So, fast forward to 11 1/2 years later. Because the father of these children (aka my husband) is concerned about lice in his own hair (and desperately hoping to find one, just one, so he can work from home), he wakes me up to check his head after I've had maybe 5 or 6 hours of sleep, if that much, and that with a very stuffy nose making it hard to breathe. I fall asleep, but wake up again, this time to be greeted by, "I am going to the zoo." You know, I was about ready to send her for a few hours at that point. The monkeys could have nit-picked for me. I've combed through 4 heads of hair today. My own is the most challenging, so I'm just going to wash it & comb through as best I can. Bethany's I did morning and tonight. Found live lice. Gross. Someone suggested oil, so I covered her head in hair glossing oil. Then a friend told me tea tree oil. I have a little container of tea tree gel, so I worked that into her hair. I have washed so many items in the past 24 hours that I really could qualify as washateria. THAT wasn't in the job description either.

I tried sleeping more on the couch while we watched a movie, The Game Plan. Phil had previewed it & told me to fast forward through the beginning. There were other parts I could have ff'd through, too. But, the gist of the movie is that a self-absorbed football player suddenly discovers he has a child by his ex-wife. He doesn't want her at first, but by the end of the movie, he realizes that she is the most important thing in his life. Okay, the Author of the REAL Instruction Book had to remind me that my job description may not include nit-picking specifically, but it does include loving and nurturing my children. It includes teaching them in God's ways. It includes feet washing, self-sacrifice, and a thankful heart. Ouch. I don't like that one all the time.

It was a good thing I had that revelation at the time because the next thing that happened was our TV died. More accurately, it became a radio. We totally lost the picture. Yes, it is good to have quiet and have the TV off, NORMALLY, but when it happens on a day when Mom is sick & kids are quarantined, it's not so good. Thankfully, we have some hand-me-down TV's and my very smart husband was able to get us set up when he got home. Side note: I laughed when he was working on how to hook up this TV & said, "This piece is not part of the equation." Wouldn't a simple, "I don't need this part," be easier? LOL!

Now, tomorrow when I get up & am cranky again, someone will remind me to be nice, right?

Um, Natalie, what's that in your hair?

Have you ever had one of those days? Weeks? Months? Or, in our case, years? I'm running fever, my throat hurts like crazy, my ears keep popping, and I'm sleep deprived from not breathing well while sleeping due to a stuffy nose. We managed to make it to the doctor's office, and somehow, with a stroke of genius, I brought schoolwork for them to do at the dr's so they wouldn't cry "BORED" the whole time. It was a new doctor, since mine quit her practice. I had a gazillion new patient forms to fill out. "Did your 2nd cousin twice removed ever have the flu?" Okay, that's exaggerated, but they did want info back to my grandparents. The schoolwork came in handy while I did my own paperwork.

I finished all the papers about the time that Natalie finished her work. She was standing close enough that I could see a black speck in her hair. I thought it was a piece of dirt or something. She came closer, I reached in to remove it, and the piece of dirt moved. So, I pulled it off and flicked in on the floor. Yeah, really smart. I looked and found a few more of these moving specks. I knew that lice nits were white, but had no idea what color lice were. My first words to this brand new doctor were, "What color are lice?" "Black. Does she have them?" I told her about the black specks & she said, "She has lice." Then she checked me (not for lice, but for the respiratory crud), prescribed a z-pack and sent us on her way. I wonder if she disinfected the room after we left. Or the office. Shudder.

When we got in the car, I had to remember who the girls were last with. AWANA, they were at church last night. They took a friend with them. I called the friend's mom. I thought I'd had another dropped call because after I mentioned something moving in Natalie's hair and heard her say, "Oh, no," the phone went silent. Turned out I had just put her into temporary shock. At Wal-Mart we stocked up on Lice killing shampoo and spray. My friend, meanwhile, started the research for me & when I got home I had "Louseology 101" waiting for me!

3 heads have been treated. We've sprayed the couch & bedding that can't be washed (um, that's the mattress). I've washed at least 3 loads of washable bedding in very hot water. I've called Call-A-Nurse (again, I told the nurse I was afraid she'd answer with, "Oh, it's you again.") to find out how long we need to be quarantined (until no nits or live lice are found; not too helpful!). Phil has gone to work to get his laptop, which he normally brings home, thinking he might quarantine himself to the house for a day. Now we have to wait for pillows to dry. They take a very long time to dry. A VERY long time.

I've also called my dad to officially bow out of being a helper at their house this week. I've listened to Natalie cry and scream, "I hate lice! I'm mad that God made lice! Why did God have to make stupid lice?" I told her my theory is that God made them good but satan made them bite. Yeah, it's in the LMV Bible (Lori's Mom version). I've looked over Phil's head, several times, listening to him asking, "Don't you see ANY of them on there? Are you sure? Can't you find ONE?" He has very dark hair (minus the grays, most of which have Natalie's name on them), so it's hard to see at first, but it's very short (unlike the time to dry the pillows; oh, did I mention that?). I found one piece with a white something at the end. I told the Call-A-Nurse that he was wondering if he should stay home & she laughed & said for him to show up at work, start scratching his head & go home!

I have NEVER, I repeat NEVER had head lice. Not as a child. Not as a teenager. Not in college. Not even as a teacher (and I caught every other bug they brought me). I even had Dad ask Mom & she said, "Nope, never had them." However MOM had them as a child, so Dad said to blame it on her.

I called 2 of the neighbors to notify them. They'd received notes from school that lice is going around. One mom checked her kids & called me back. They are clear so far. I'm so glad as she has a newborn baby. She doesn't need lice right now! The other I notified, but haven't heard if they found any. I've notified our homeschool co-op by e-mail. I feel like we have the black plague or something.

By the way, I still am running fever, throat hurts, ears are popping, and I feel just awful. But I don't get sick days. What's up with that anyway? I think I need to contact my union. Oh, wait, I live with the union. Oh, well! At least if the Union stays home tomorrow, we can run to vote without kids.

I have to ask a question now, and you need to leave a comment with your answer. Did your head start itching just reading about lice?

I just want to bang on the drum all day

I think our neighbor has this song memorized, at least the percussion part. He's been playing his drums all afternoon and evening. He is INSIDE his house with all the doors & windows shut. We have DOUBLE-PANED glass, and I can still hear him. I turned on K-love on the computer to see if I could drown it out. Nope. I do not want to play on the drum all day. I want to go smack a drumstick upside someone's head, but I'm pretty sure that's not "what Jesus would do."

After my 2 rambling posts, here's an update. Just talked to Mom. She sounds really good. She was tired, but didn't sound groggy at all like she has. She said the Physical Therapist (PT) who came out mashed on her knee yesterday & it has hurt ever since. A different PT will come out next week. She said the one that came set her knee bending machine higher than she thought it was supposed to be set, too. I asked if she wanted me to go beat him up. She laughed. Some friends were over visiting her and had taken supper. My nephew, Nils, was there, too. Wonder if Katie got to eat tonight. Nils never misses a meal. What am I saying? NO ONE in our family misses a meal! Once I asked my brother Greg if he ever forgot to eat a meal & he told me no, but that Nils told him that he sometimes forgets he's eaten & eats again! LOL! Back to mom, she was tired, but sounds like she is doing well.

Phil took the beautiful day to ride his motorcycle up to work on Ruth's computer. It's WAY cheaper to take the bike than the van (something like 70 miles per gallon), and he loves doing that. It's his therapy! I sometimes tell my dad that Phil is "golfing" when he's riding his motorcycle. Golfing is Dad's therapy. He should be home soon.

The girls have been at neighbors' houses all afternoon. They came home from one & got a call to go to another house. It's been nice & quiet, which is nice because I feel yucky today. I think the allergies have gone into infection. Natalie called a few minutes ago. She started with a nice voice, "Mommy, how are you feeling?" That was my first clue something was up. "I'm sick, honey." "Oh. We were wondering if (neighbor girl) could spend the night." "No, honey, I'm sick." "But MOMMY, we will leave you ALONE!" "No, honey I'm sick. AND you have to finish cleaning your room." "But MOMMY, we FINISHED it." This went on for a couple more sentences. I won. Have I mentioned I never want to be a single mom?

That's what's going on at our house. Hope you are all having a great day!

Therapy 202

I do have a second therapy that used to be mainly for pleasure, but has become a necessity, and an occupation. I have loved cooking and baking since I was at least 7 years old. I know this because my mom has oft told the story of little 7 year old Lori asking, "What does the t stand for in the cookbook?" Mom explained about teaspoons and tablespoons. I went back to the kitchen and made a PIE CRUST by myself! All was well until we bit into it and discovered that I had not learned the DIFFERENCE between teaspoon and Tablespoon. The pie was a bit salty.

I spent many days in the kitchen growing up. Baking was preferred to cooking. I love sweets. And, for most my life, I could eat what I baked and enjoy it without any consequences. Now that I have hit the "over 40" mark and been diagnosed with Celiac Disease, that's changed a bit. I've had new challenges in baking. Imagine trying to make a loaf of bread without gluten: no all-purpose flour, no bread flour, no whole wheat flour, no spelt, no rye, no barley, and normally no oats. It's definitely challenging! One of my goals in life is to create the first Gluten Free Crescent Roll that will taste like Pillsbury crescents!

When I attended my first Pampered Chef show, I was quite pregnant and went just for the free food! The only time I'd ever REALLY sold anything in my life was working at Payless Shoes in college. I was a teacher, and now a mom. Yet, when I saw these tools, I thought, "WOW! If EVER I were going to sell something, THIS would be it." 3 years later, I signed on the line, and started a business doing something I love. Little did I know that getting the kitchen tools free or at greatly reduced prices would be a lifesaver a few years later.

Some people cook from scratch because they love it. Some people cook from scratch because they have to do it to feed the family. I do it for both of those reasons, and others. I can no longer grab a can of cream of mushroom soup and a bag of noodles to make beef stroganoff. I have yet to find a can of mushroom soup on the shelves in our stores that is gluten free (apart from the $3.00 cans at the health food store). A loaf of bread, you know, that thing that can be bought for as little as 69 cents if you go generic? If I buy a pre-made tiny loaf of gluten free bread, it will cost $5.00 or so, and will likely taste freezer burned and cardboardish. A mix is about the same price, but makes a bigger loaf and tastes better. To make it from scratch means mixing several different flours together (rice, potato, teff, quinoa, and other assorted "exotic grains"), adding some xanthan gum, which kind of acts like gluten (providing elasticity), and just the right amount of liquid; not overmixing, not over-proofing, and baking just the right amount of time. Because the bread dough is more of a batter, I can't freeze the dough in portions like I could with wheat bread dough. I have to say, cooking at home, in my tiny kitchen, with all the changes for gluten free, is NOT therapeutic like it used to be.

THAT is why I love my job as a Kitchen Consultant. I LOVE going into homes where I can actually see the countertops, have exactly the ingredients I need in front of me, and not worry about food allergies (unless, of course, the host or guests are allergic). I love our company's mission. We are putting families back around the table. Our new shows are focusing on FAST recipes that, combined with our FAST tools, get you in & out of the kitchen FAST. I am ready to get back to cooking for people and showing them how easy it can be when you have the right tools! I am teaching a class of middle school students how to cook. If THEY can cook, then I know any adult who wants to provide healthy food for their families can do this! Do I sound like a woman on a mission? LOL!

There, you have read about my 2 therapies in life. If only I could find time to DO those things! My first and most important priority within my family is to be a wife and a mom. Stamping and discovering a million ways to make gluten free bread have to wait. However, I do sometimes get the girls to stamp with me, and am teaching them to cook. You know measuring DOES count as a math lesson........

Therapy 101

Do you have a "therapy" in life that is cheaper than Therapy? Of course, turning to the Lord and His word are the first course. But, sometimes we need to think of day 7 of creation, when even the Lord took a day off of His work to rest. And maybe my "therapy" wouldn't be considered rest by some, but, it is so soothing to me. Actually, over the years I've had different types. But there is one I have now that traces back to my childhood. If you walked into my tiny house today you would probably NOT peg me as "the child who did everything perfectly." I didn't do EVERYTHING perfectly, but I am SURE that I was the best at coloring in the lines as a child.

As I got older, I learned to sew, which is somewhat like staying in the lines. You have to cut pieces just so, and match them, then sew them oh, so carefully. The sewer's mantra is "As you sew, so shall you rip," meaning, if you don't do it right, you will be removing stitches (I've done that plenty of times, which means I obviously didn't do it right all the time). Then came other crafts: needlework, crochet, painting on fabric. In college my friend Bev (who lived with my family our first semester of college) and I would come home after a stressful day at school (who knew those people who said college was a cake walk compared to real life were serious!) and pull out coloring books and crayons. Yep, two 18 year olds would just lay their watching reruns and coloring. We always had a bowl of Bluebell Ice Cream, too (and stayed amazingly thin, which has nothing to do with coloring, but is a nice memory).

Now, so many years later I have a new therapy that has taken me full circle. It's rubber stamping. Those of you who have this same addiction, um, I mean therapy, know what I'm talking about. This isn't the old happy face stamp, or the "paid in full" office stamps of days gone by. These are stamps that take someone like me, who can't draw very well, and turn her into an artist. I am still in the amateur division of this art, but it is still so therapeutic. AND, I've discovered that there are a LOT of ways to color in the lines! I can stamp a picture, then use markers, colored pencils, watercolor pencils, or watercolor crayons to color in the the picture.

People have told me they thought I was spending too much money by having a hobby like this. We have always had to be frugal in our marriage, and this is another area where I've learned to be frugal. Stores that sell some of the things used in stamping have coupons almost weekly. That's one way to save money. Another, and my favorite way, is to host a show. I've had friends come over to watch my Stampin' Up (a company that sells stamps through home parties, much like I do with Pampered Chef) demonstrator show us how to make a card, then let us make one ourselves. Like Pampered Chef, as a host, I earned free product. I've also found a few age old ideas have come back to life. Bartering has become a way of life. Remember watching shows about the "old West" when people would pay the doctor with eggs and bread? Some of my stamping friends will swap stamping supplies for Pampered Chef items. Another "novel idea" is sharing. The first time we went into a stamp store, Bethany (about 5 or 6 at the time) asked, "Do we have to pay or do you just borrow this?" My friends and I share our stamps. And, here's another brainstorm: Generosity. If you see a stamped image you like, but you don't live close enough to borrow the stamp (though, I've mailed stamps to people far away to borrow), we will stamp images for one another. I also must say that I have been blessed by some of the kindest, most generous stampers around. I have had people give me stamps "just because." I am always shocked and amazed when this happens.

There you have it. Confessions of a stamper, Therapy 101. I'll share about another therapy in a different post.